Thursday Thoughts: December 11, 2025
by the Rev. Dr. Dennis E. Morey
Faith Presbyterian Church, Cedar Rapids, IA
I kept this from a few years ago as something worth sharing from the internet.
I would like to offer my Christmas adaptation and rename it:
Satan’s Christmas Plans
“Satan called a worldwide convention of demons. In his address to the multitude, he said, “It is useless to try to keep the Christians from going to church during this season. We can’t keep them from reading the Bible and from knowing the truth. We can’t keep them from forming an intimate relationship with Christ. But just because they have gained a connection to him doesn’t mean we have to give up. Here is a blow they will never see coming.
We will steal their time, so they won’t be able to develop their relationship with Christ to the point they are able to resist our plan. Whenever their mind drifts toward their Savior, distract them. We must keep them busy with things that don’t matter and we will invent multiple schemes to occupy their every thought. I have them outlined.
1. Tempt them to spend more money than they have or can earn, and get them to borrow more. Tell them “debt is justified for a good cause.”
2. Convince wives they have to work long hours and push their husbands to work six or maybe all seven days each week, maybe take a second job, to support their empty lifestyle. Tell them, “What matters most is that your kids get what everyone else is getting. After all, Christmas only comes once each year.”
3. Keep married people from spending time with each other, and keep parents from spending time with their children. This year, we want families to fragment in record numbers. Soon the home will be no refuge from the pressures of the world.
4. Keep their minds busy at all times. Make sure they have not a moment to spare to hear the still small voice of God. Make sure they have music going full-blast while in the car, keep the home TV on at all times, and make sure all programming is non-Biblical. Pound them 24 hours a day with news programs that offer only the world’s atrocities. If they believe God is in control, they will see He is doing a poor job and can’t be trusted.
5. Fill their mailboxes and e-mails with opportunities to order things that have very little relevance to anything they need. Make sure the billboards are about gambling, alcohol, and other forms of addictions marketed as entertainment.
6. Keep skinny models and handsome men on the cover of magazines so husbands and wives will grow unhappy with their spouse. Bombard their social media and keep their minds focused on what they are missing in life.
7. Keep the wives busy with their full-time jobs, their household chores, their children, and their parents. Make sure they have no time to spend with their husbands, and make sure they have an example of someone else’s husband who is perfect to remind them of what they could have if they went after him.
8. Give them Santa Claus as the centerpiece of Christmas. Don’t let them know that the real Saint Nicolas was a servant of God. Make sure Santa Claus doesn’t get mixed up in the real meaning of Christmas. Santa is to promote the good feeling that comes from consumerism.
9. When they have time to exercise, make sure it is exhausting. Keep them busy running on the treadmill where they will be watching TV. Don’t let them take a walk outside. They may be reminded of the beauties of God’s creation.
10. Give them amusement parks, sporting events, plays, concerts and movies on Sunday. Keep them so busy they won’t have time or energy to spend in spiritual fellowship with other believers. When they don’t pay attention and go to church anyway, make sure they feel really guilty while they are there so they won’t want to return. Instead, present lots of good causes to them. Let them know that being a good person will make them popular and thus create a win-win situation. Make sure that the good causes they support take their money, their energy and most of all, time away from their families.
This is the program that will work. Remember all we need to do is really focus for this one month of December. Our goal is to leave them tired, discouraged and broke so when the New Year comes, they will know that God has failed them.”
